Well, it’s official. For better, for worse, for richer, and for poorer, my baby brother is a married man. Josh and Jill’s wedding was last night, and since Fred and I couldn’t be in the States for the wedding, we found another way to participate in the festivities…
Congrats to the new Mr. and Mrs. Lundberg!
I realize it has actually been longer than a month, but it sounds nicer that way. Not only does it minimize my absence, but it also takes advantage of alliteration (yes, the English teacher is back in her element).
So, to put it mildly, I’ve been a little busy; and each week has brought it’s own adventure.
WEEK ONE was paper work for my marriage license. That was an adventure. Lots of bells and whistles to be blown or rung – and participation was not optional.
WEEK TWO was wedding plans. (You can read all about it in my upcoming book How to Plan a Brazilian Wedding in One Week.) We pulled it off - I’m indebted to those who worked to help make it happen! – but it’s not an experience I would recommend. One should give herself at least two weeks.
WEEK THREE was the honeymoon. Fred and I spent it at a small beach hotel in Iguape, a town about a ½ hr. away from Fortaleza. Enough said.
WEEK FOUR was a return to reality. Fred went back to work Monday morning, while I cleaned the apartment and unpacked boxes. Initially, when I left the U.S., I felt like I was leaving a lot behind, but I can see now that it was a good thing. We have very little room in our tiny temporary apartment, and I ended up repacking several boxes.
Aside from the essentials, any extra room is filled with books. Both Fred and I love books, and we use them regularly in our work and ministry (teaching, counseling, pastoring, etc.), so we have LOTS of them! It’s too bad I couldn’t bring my bookshelves with me – but then again, if I had, where would Mom store all the books that I left behind!
We’re currently staying at the FA Guest House while we wait for our apartment in Edson Queiroz to open up. Like most things in Brazil, the projected date keeps being extended. “Two or three weeks” can mean “two or three weeks after next month.”
WEEK FIVE was English. I took the plunge and took over the high school English classes. A week or two later, I assumed the teaching responsibilities for U.S. History. After that, the weeks begin to blur…
My “kids” are excited to have me back, but my name change has presented a challenge to them. They don’t like “Mrs. R” (too many syllables or something) and complain that it doesn’t flow like “Miss L.” Thus, without a designated name, they often default to “Miss L” in the middle of class. Worse yet, I answer without noticing the wrong name!
Married life is wonderfully normal. It’s also incredibly busy. I have to be super-conscious of and disciplined with my time, especially since meals require such extended preparation here. When I was single, I ate a lot of salads and veggies; and I had no qualms snacking my way through a meal But now! Rice, beans and meat are the basic make-up and seem simple enough, but the beans have to be soaked overnight and the meat has to be treated, and to have them all ready at the same time, along with the salad and/or veggie…ai, just typing it out makes me tired. Oh, and fresh fruit juice is also a staple. I tried cheating one day by making juice out of frozen pulp, but my Brazilian husband caught it right away. Not that he complained; he just noticed. Would you?
I also now make a regular trips to the paderia (bread store) whereas before, as an avoid-white-dedicated-wheat-bread girl, it was only once in a while. I also make a lot more visits to the mercado (grocery store). And then the wash has doubled as has my ironing. Actually, the truth be told, I never ironed when I lived by myself because I specifically bought clothes that would not need ironing! I probably should have taken that into consideration before marrying a man who wears a dress shirt every day to work.
But even in the busyness, I enjoy Fred’s constant companionship. He is a very attentive and carring husband; and we have fun doing stuff together. I don’t think I had any expectations of married life, and I was probably a bit more prepared for what was to come due to my counseling experiences (vs. a starry-eyed-20-year-old); so all that has helped in the transition.
I read a quote the other day that summed married life up well. Basically it said if you want TIME to serve Christ, don’t get married; however, if you want TO BE LIKE CHRIST, get married. So true. Of my single life, I miss my time the most; and never did I imagine how petty I could yet be at this point in my spiritual walk. Who knew I could be so selfish?! (That’s a rhetorical question.)
I had to laugh when I heard a friend of mine, who was also recently married, asked his mom, “Did I suddenly become less sanctified when I said, ‘I do’?” It certainly feels like it some days! Thankfully, God (and Fred!) are gracious and loving and kind.
So there it is; and speaking of time, mine’s up for today.
I would love copies of any and all photos that people took at 
Friday night’s Wedding Celebration. If you are willing to share your pictures, please email them to me at tom_gurl@hotmail.com or let me know where to download them online (unless you have another preferred method to share). Thanks!
I will be posting mine on my Flickr account later this week (accessible through my blog). Enjoy!!
I know of few brides who plan a wedding without a groom – okay, I don’t know any! – so how I came to be one is a mystery to me; but not to God. And it was He, I believe, who received all the praise from Friday night’s celebration. As my brother Shon said in his challenge that night, we don’t know why God didn’t allow Fred to get a visa, but we do know that it is for our good.
Thank all of you who helped to make it such a special evening. Some helped with planning & decorations. Some served punch and beijinhos de coco; while others helped make the food, including meals for my family. Some recorded the event with pictures and video, and others sang special music, including Katrina’s impromptu choir’s presentation of “God Bless Our Kari.” Many helped with the clean up afterward. Each and every act of service was a tremendous help, blessing and encouragement. Thank you.
I also with to thank those who made the evening special simply by their presence. Several of you traveled long distances only to stay a short time, then travel home again late at night. Those from church were weary after the week’s preparation for Saturday’s Internation Give Away. Others had physical limitations, etc. and endured much to attend. Please know that I recognize the time, energy, and resources you all gave to be there on Friday evening. Know also that your sacrifice of love made your presence all that much sweeter. Thank you.
A special thanks to my oldest brother and the Steven and Carol Celarier for the gift of Fred’s presence. Seeing him stand up front brought tears to my eyes. You’ll never know what a delight his “presence” brought to my evening.
Last, but certainly not least, I wish to thank my family who gave of themselves in unmeasureable ways to help me celebrate this special event. I love you all deeply and praise God for you. Thank you for the numerous ways you demonstrate your love toward me.
I’m not going to bother with build up. Fred’s visa was denied.
The last question on Fred’s application (which we filled out months ago when we first made the appointment) asked if Fred was related to or engaged to anyone living in the U.S. We paused in our progress, recognizing what such an answer could cost us; and indeed, it did.
Fred’s engagment was the key issue – the only issue – during his interview. Very likely, if we had lied on his application, Fred would have recieved his visa; however, that is not really a plausible scenario, for as Fred said to me today, “There was no other choice; that was the answer.”
Thank you for your prayers. Please do not be disappointed with the result or think them unaswered. They were!! And in the very best way possible – through God’s tremendous work of grace in our hearts.
I am disappointed, and yes, I’ve cried (Fred has, too.); but we are not devestated or disillusioned by the consulate’s response. God is still sovereign, and God is still good. That has not changed. Although we may have trouble seeing the answer through our earthly eyes, this answer is the best answer for Fred and my good; and we praise Him for His marvelous work of grace in our lives.
O Father, You are Sovereign
(to the tune of “The Church’s One Foundation”)
O Father, You are Sovereign
In all the worlds you made;
Your mighty word has spoken,
And light and life obeyed.
Your voice commands the seasons
And bound the ocean shore,
Sets stars within their courses
And still the tempest’s roar.
O Father, You are Sovereign
In all affairs of man;
No powers of death and darkness
Can thwart Your perfect plan.
All chance and change transcending,’
Supreme in time and space,
You hold your trusting children
Secure in Your embrace.
O Father, You are Sovereign,
Lord of human pain,
Transmuting earthly sorrows
To gold of heavenly gain.
All evil overruling
And none by Conqueror could,
Your love pursues its purpose -
Our soul’s eternal good.
O Father, You are Sovereign;
We see you dimly now,
But soon before Your triumph
Earth’s every knee shall bow.
With this glad hope before us
Our faith springs forth anew;
Our sovereign Lord and Savior,
We trust and worship You.
Aren’t you glad God never makes mistakes. He never misspeaks. He never misunderstands. So while we humans struggle with such fallacies from time to time, He doesn’t. At the same time, in His marvelous sovereignty, God uses the fallacies of man to teach and train his children along their journey of progressive sanctification. Such is the case today. There was a misunderstanding regarding Fred’s interview date, and it is actually scheduled for July 28.
That’s significant for several reasons. First and most obvious, it adds to the wait time for Fred’s visa. The Lord knows how much I need to learn to depend and wait on Him, and He has graciously given me more time to do so.
Second, this affects many – okay, nearly all of the planning aspects for the wedding. While the end-of-June interview date put pressure on our tentative wedding schedule, it still left time to arrange and take care of various details. The corrected end-of-July date, a mere few weeks before the wedding, does not.
On one hand, all this makes me want to laugh. After all, I’ve always been a haphazard last-minute girl who somehow manages to perform (relatively) well under pressure…um, you all don’t need to agree so readily on that point…anyway, it’s only fitting then that my wedding should be so, too.
On the other hand, I have to laugh, too, when I think of my mother. (Poor dear.) You see, thus far in the wedding planning process, I have been told, “No,” several times. (The key word seems to be liability.) Flexibility has already taken on new meaning for me and my family this year, but we will, no doubt, plumb its depths in the month to come; and now I have all the more reason to be creative! Things are going to get interesting around here. (There’s a reason this blog is entitled, “The Adventures of Fred and Fern”!)
With that said, let the festivities commence!
That’s right! I’m home for Christmas – actually, I’m home because my visa expired, but it will be a treat to spend the holidays with my family nonetheless. As for the cold weather, well, I’ll take it (do I have a choice?) but it’s more of a trial than a treat.
Most of you know that my plans to apply for a permanent visa were radically altered in October after a visit to the Federal Police revealed that a new law had been passed altering the requirements to transfer a Type V visa into a permanent one. I did not fulfill the requirements; therefore, I could not apply. God’s grace, however, is sufficient, and He has used this difficulty to prove His faithfulness, His greatness and His sovereignty.
The Fortaleza Academy’s urgent need for an English teacher persists as the current one is scheduled to leave in just a few weeks at the end of the first semester. I believe the Lord has equipped and prepared me for “such a time as this”; so Lord willing, I will to return to Brazil temporarily on a tourist visa to teach English for the spring semester. This will also enable me to continue my church and discipleship work at Igreja Batista Bíblica Maranata in Edson Queiroz, an economically depressed neighborhood of Fortaleza; I also desire to begin work on my biblical counseling certification.
Then in July, I will return to the States for an important wedding – mine. Yes, the rumors are all true, and I am engaged to Frederico Augusto Rodrigues after accepting his proposal of marraige to me on a moonlit beach in Taiba, Brazil, on October 26.
Fred (prounounced FREH-GEE) and I met at Igreja Batista Bíblica Maranata. Fred is the youth leader (so you may recognize or remember his name from my prayer letters or updates), and I was often called upon to help him organize activities. Our time together revealed our complimentary strengths and weaknesses, our passion for ministry and our committment to Lord; while our prayers together confirmed His will for our lives. Thus, Lord enabling, we will be married next summer here in the U.S.; after which which we will return to Brazil and continue with the work in Edson Queiroz.
Then after God has done abundantly more than I ever thought or asked, according to His perfect will, I will finally be qualified to apply for my permanent visa!
“Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think,
according to the power that works within us, TO HIM BE THE GLORY
in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen.”
Ephesians 3:20-21
